Everyday Away and Towards Moves in Recovery

Choosing the Life You Want

Recovery from addiction is not a single moment—it’s a continuous journey made up of countless choices every day. For people working towards healthier lives, each moment offers a chance to move towards the life they want or drift away into old habits that no longer serve them. Understanding these “towards” and “away” moves can bring awareness, compassion, and intentionality to your recovery.

What Are Away and Towards Moves?

• Towards moves are actions that align with your values, goals, and the person you want to become. These choices help you build a meaningful, fulfilling life grounded in recovery.

• Away moves pull you away from your values and your recovery. They often arise automatically—old coping habits that once felt necessary but now create distance from your well-being.

Recognizing these moves is key because it helps you respond with intention rather than react out of habit.

Why Does This Matter?

Every day you make hundreds of decisions—some small, some big. Each choice is an opportunity to take a step towards your recovery goals. Even small, consistent towards moves build momentum and reinforce your values. On the other hand, away moves can quietly pull you off course if left unchecked.

This awareness is not about perfection or blame. Everyone makes away moves sometimes. What matters is noticing these moments, understanding what triggered them, and gently guiding yourself back towards the life you want to create. Recovery is growth, not judgment.

Everyday Examples

Away Moves Might Look Like:

• Isolating or shutting down when feeling overwhelmed instead of reaching out for support

• Reacting with anger or blaming others rather than pausing to process emotions

• Using distractions like excessive screen time or compulsive behaviours to avoid feelings

• Negative self-talk or harsh self-judgment

• Romanticizing past substance use or reconnecting with old triggers

• Avoiding responsibilities or skipping recovery activities

Towards Moves Might Include:

• Calling a trusted friend, sponsor, or support person when feeling triggered

• Practicing mindfulness, meditation, or deep breathing to manage stress

• Journaling your feelings instead of bottling them up

• Choosing nourishing food and regular exercise to support your body

• Attending recovery meetings, therapy, or support groups

• Offering yourself compassion and positive self-talk

• Setting small, achievable goals and celebrating progress

How to Redirect Away Moves Into Towards Moves

1. Notice and Name the Away Move
   Simply observe without judgment. For example, “I’m scrolling on my phone to avoid feeling anxious.” This awareness creates space to choose differently.

2. Practice Self-Compassion
   Treat yourself kindly. Remember, away moves are common and part of the journey—not a failure.

3. Clarify Your Values
   Remind yourself what matters most: connection, honesty, health, or growth. Ask, “What choice aligns with my values right now?”

4. Break Actions Into Small Steps
   Large goals can feel overwhelming. Choose one manageable action that moves you forward—like sending a message or taking a short walk.

5. Make If-Then Plans
   Anticipate triggers with specific responses. For example, “If I start to isolate, then I will text a trusted friend.”

6. Use Mindfulness to Pause
   Deep breathing or grounding techniques help you create space between feelings and reactions.

7. Reflect on the Costs and Benefits
   Ask yourself, “Does this away move bring me closer to the life I want? What might I lose by continuing it?”

You Don’t Have to Catch It in the Moment (and That’s Okay)

Recognizing an away move after it happens is just as valuable as catching it in real time. Sometimes we don’t notice until hours—or even days—later that we slipped into an old pattern. That doesn’t mean we’ve failed. In fact, reflecting after the fact is a powerful part of recovery.

Growth happens when we take time to pause, look back with compassion, and ask ourselves:

• What was going on for me in that moment?

• What need was I trying to meet?

• What might a towards move have looked like instead?

This kind of gentle reflection builds self-awareness and helps you respond differently next time. The goal is progress. Every time you notice an away move, even in hindsight, you’re creating an opportunity to reconnect with your values and take a step forward.

A Daily Practice to Support Your Recovery

At the end of each day, take a moment to reflect:

• What was one away move I made? What led to it?

• What was one towards move I made? How did it feel?

With practice, you’ll become more aware and better able to choose towards moves that support your well-being.

Final Thoughts

Recovery is a journey of self-awareness and growth. Recognizing away moves isn’t about judgment, but rather insight. It’s about gently steering yourself towards the life you want—one choice at a time. And if you notice away moves becoming a pattern, consider reaching out for extra support or revisiting your recovery plan.

Recommended Further Reading

• Harris, Russ. ACT Made Simple: An Easy-to-Read Primer on Acceptance and Commitment Therapy. New Harbinger Publications, 2019.
  A practical guide to living a values-driven life with mindfulness and self-compassion, ideal for anyone working on recovery.

• Linehan, Marsha M. Building a Life Worth Living: A Memoir. Simon & Schuster, 2020.
  A compassionate memoir from the creator of Dialectical Behavior Therapy, offering relatable insights on emotional regulation and healing.

• Brach, Tara. Radical Acceptance: Embracing Your Life with the Heart of a Buddha. Bantam, 2004.
  A beautifully written book on self-compassion and mindfulness to help overcome shame and cultivate healing.

• Brown, Brené. The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You're Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are. Hazelden Publishing, 2010.
  An empowering, accessible book about self-acceptance and wholehearted living, which aligns well with recovery values.

Disclaimer

The information provided in this blog is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for professional medical, psychological, or therapeutic advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician, therapist, or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical or mental health condition. If you are in crisis or need immediate assistance, please reach out to a professional or crisis service in your area or visit epicrecovery.ca/crisis.